A Healthy Part of a Balanced Breakfast

So, I saw my doctor again recently. It was one of those regularly scheduled appointments (so I can do my part to pay for his new inground pool).

He gave me the normal doctor's lecture about eating healthier, right out of the 2005 Normal Doctor's Lecture Book.

OK, I get it. Here's what I have to do....

1] Eat More Bran. Now, the truth be told, I prefer most of the cereals that are promoted by cartoon characters. But, I haven't yet found a healthy cereal with its own mascot.

To me, these bran cereals have no glossy boxes, no pretty colored flakes, no toys inside, and no taste!

But I guess they are good for me. My doctor says that if I eat my bran cereal it will be good for me in the end. I think I know WHICH END he is talking about, too.

So moving on to the rest of a healthy breakfast...

2] Soy Milk (on my bran cereal) - We all know that soy milk is REALLY healthy for us, but who ever heard of milking a SOY COW?

3] Egg Beaters - That's where they shake the cholesterol out of a chicken to get healthier eggs.

4] Healthy Low-Salt Bacon - I pity the poor pig that had to go on such a low salt diet.

And the final question is this. "What to put on my whole wheat, hard-to-digest toast?" Well, I've found the perfect solution. In the dairy aisle of my favorite grocer I found a pound of "I Can't Believe They Think This Tastes Like Butter". (I think I will give it a try).

OK, enough talk of food, I am getting hungry. I wonder what my doctor is having for breakfast?

-Jack